How many big events can happen in a week before I throw in the towel? Exactly where is my breaking point? I don't know, but I'm completely amazed I haven't reached mine yet. As Jared put it this morning, "Just how many irons can we fit in our fire??"
1-Last Tuesday my dad called with the unexpected news that BOTH of my grandparents had been put in a nursing home. The situation was fishy and we couldn't figure out how it happened (seeing how going to a nursing home was the dead LAST thing grandpa ever wanted and had stated many times). Being the nearest relative to them (besides a long estranged aunt who recently moved into their house- a.k.a.: the fishy part), I turned tail and headed for Muncie. We dropped Coleson off at scout camp (with a sitter at the house with the other 3) and headed out of town. We had NO idea what awaited us. Apparently the "estranged" aunt was legitimate in her motives to come and help them, but the doctor took it out of her hands and decided that they had both at the same time (ironically) gone down-hill so much that they couldn't safely remain at home anymore. And he admitted them to a nursing home. The analogy I came up with was that for so long their 2 halves had made a whole, where grandma was the brains and grandpa was the muscle. But her mind and his body had recently (in the last 6 weeks since I'd been to visit) become so much less than half that they no longer made a whole. Grandma is bad enough that she needs 24 hour care. Probably in the nursing home. Grandpa, although in need of care, isn't bad enough to necessarily need 24 hour care, but definitely frequent and almost complete care. He could probably go home with someone to care for him all the time. BUT he won't leave grandma. Not in a 1,000 years. His doctor was kind enough to see the emotional as well as physical needs, and keep them both there together. They have a little room with both of their beds. They're together at least. Later we can figure out what to do with grandpa, when it's just him left. But that's just the medical side of it (and only a small sliver at that- each appointment and decision is so labor intensive trying to decide what's best for them). The other side of the situation is the financial. And it's a big side. We all must have asked grandma and grandpa a dozen times what their final plans were. Grandpa always got very defensive about it- like that day was never going to come and he didn't need to think about it. So when they're suddenly mentally, emotionally, and legally incapacitated - we had to figure out everything from scratch. I started by searching their house for any documents. And boy there were plenty of those! Old people keep everything. But hidden in the rubble was a Will they had drawn up. It was official and complete- from a lawyer. A complete shock. It stated very plainly that all 3 children had to jointly make each and every decision- Joint Trustees. I will NEVER do that to my children. I understand where they were coming from in doing it, because they didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings. But for crying out loud!!!! Could this be any more difficult?!?!?! Do you know how hard it is to get 3 people at 3 different points of the country to come together on plans? I do! It's impossible. Everyone has their own ideas and plans (albeit the other two may have their own agendas and plans- not necessarily what's best for G & G). And I'm stuck in the middle trying to work it all out and make sure grandma and grandpa are getting good care. How can a nursing home take 24 hour care of someone and not know what I know when I can only come every few days??? So for the past week and a half (a very long week and a half) I've been driving to Munice. And will continue to for as long as it takes.
2- We have always bounced around the idea of home school. Hunter started out last year in public school at Mintonye, but then at Thanksgiving time I really felt like he needed to stay home with me for a while as we started the process of finding a good medicine for him. In March, he reentered the school scene with a fresh (and AMAZING!) teacher- Mrs. Ayala. She helped him truly succeed and feel good about his academic and social self (along with the help of his medicine and her teacher's aide). But this year, Hunter wouldn't have it so good. One teacher. No aide. More curriculum. All come together to make a bad soup. Of course I don't know this for absolute, but I have a pretty strong feeling. Medicine hasn't completely lulled him and he is still very ADHD. So for him, I was strongly thinking home school for this fall. I found a really neat new public school online program where the curriculum, hours, and program is laid out for us step by step. Yes!! That's exactly what he needs. "This is what we're doing today-period". So it was an easy decision to do this Connections Academy with him. But what about Coleson? Should I just do one boy and send the other to Mintonye? I could. People have mixed educations in the same home. Whatever works for your family. But the longer I thought about Coleson going back to school, the more doubts I had. Coleson during the school year is like a 15 year old girl trapped in an 8 year old body. No joke. He is moody, has a MONSTER attitude, is disrespectful, and does things that I consider "questionable". At the end of last school year, I was pretty sure I couldn't stand him anymore. What was he going to be like by the time he really turned 15??? But this summer, I have really laid down the law. No wiggle room. Schedule to the hilt. It hasn't really been those care free summer days that lag on with no rhyme or reason. And his attitude has improved drastically. But what happens when he gets together with his buds for a before school activity? The monster returns!! It's like they feed off of each other. A lot of other moms I talk to say that their kids are the same way- disrespectful, won't listen (I actually thought Coleson's ears didn't work and took him to have them tested- unfortunately they DO work), and just nasty. Poor school teachers. You know, they just don't have the time or power anymore to extract excellent behavior. And I don't get to see him enough in the day to enforce or encourage good behavior as much as he needs. So, finally I decided (just yesterday actually). I don't want to let this problem get worse over the next year or several years and then look back wishing I'd done something to nip it in the bud. I'm taking action now. So Coleson will do the online public school for 3rd grade for behavioral reasons. He gets to be part of a classroom and all. And Hunter will do it for 1st grade for academic reasons. I just don't know how I'm going to do it. Lots of prayer.
3- I need to find a way to earn extra money from home. I just have to. Something has to give. My sister-in-law, Tracy, makes bread from home. "I can do that", I thought. And so I'm going to. I already make bread all the time anyway. And I do it with the kids. And during the day. And it doesn't effect anyone. So, I can just bake more. I decided to call it "BETTER TOGETHER" with a tag line- "homemade breads and jams by Sarah". People are always raving about my jam, so why not put it with the bread and make a little
dough? I started out by asking the principal at Mintonye if I could bring cinnamon rolls to the teachers lounge on Friday mornings. He agreed, but then said, "Actually, I need a breakfast catered for our teachers breakfast next Monday- do you want to do that?" How could I pass up that opportunity? So now I'm doing that and I'll keep looking for other catering opportunities on the side as well. A big job or two a month would be fabulous.
4- Jared's shop (Four Guns) found out they had to/mutually wanted to move this week. He found a location just across the street from where he's at now with a much nicer land lord. And they start renovating Monday. This is big for the shop. The new location is bigger and has way more parking spaces (the current location only has 3 spaces). And his computer system crashed this week. So he bought and installed a new POS system. All very eventful.
5- Looks like Becca's going to get remarried. Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
6- Oh, Jared was asking me this question as we were preparing a huge lunch for a stake primary mother/ daughter activity that I was asked to prepare lunch for. So we spent all last night and a mad rush this morning making little club sandwich kabobs and fruit kabobs. In the end, we had just the right amount of food and it looked beautiful. But not without a little stress.
7- I'm tired. I've gone to Muncie 3 times in the past week.
8- And I'm still the Primary president. That's huge in and of itself. There's always a list as long as my arm of things I need to do or prep for. I still love it. Don't get me wrong. But it does take time. Which is apparently something I'm running short of.
All of these things added together (all going on at the same stink'n time) has me wondering- "How much can I handle?" I know it's only prayer and faith that I can do what I do so far.
